I found the following article last year, and am posting it here. I have no idea who wrote it, or when. It appears to be written by a non-Christian, but for all I know, it could have been written by a disenfranchised Christian. But whoever wrote it, it says a lot of things that I think and feel, and so I am posting it. Whether you like what is written below or not, please recognize that there are millions of people out there (both believers in Jesus and religious people) who empathize with what this person wrote. So here it is:
I went to church this Sunday; it was the first time in over a year and I was reminded once again why I will never be able to call myself a Christian. The people there were quite handsome, I’ll give them that. The building was beautiful, a masterpiece of architecture with a marble foyer and picturesque stained glass. There was greenery in every corner, which was about the only indication of life in the whole place. I sat on a very comfortable bench next to well-dressed people with plastic smiles full of bright white teeth.
The man in charge of music made us sing the same chorus over and over until everyone seemed to have convinced themselves that God was pleased, and then we all were told to greet one another. While an organ played some little diddy, a man extended his hand and asked me how I was, to which I replied, “Fine.” This happened three more times before I decided to tell the truth. “How are you this morning?” asked a perfect specimen of a young lady. “Horrible. Awful.” I replied. Her answer to my answer? “Well, praise God.” She never even heard me.
A few moments later a man approached the podium and talked about the great financial need of the church – apparently God was broke this weekend – and then he told us to give an offering as the Spirit led us. The Spirit didn’t say nothing to me so I didn’t give a dime when they passed the buckets – yes, an actual bucket – my way.
At this point it struck me that I had heard about the church, about money, about pastor so-and-so, but nobody had mentioned anything about Jesus. Seriously, not one word about their Christ. Oh, well, what did I care? I mean, after all, they were the Christians, not me.
Still holding out hope that the day would not be a wash, I listened to their preacher as he asked us to turn to the book called Matthew. He read about Jesus telling the disciples to not worry about anything because God would feed and clothe them. Nothing wrong with that in my book. For the next fifteen minutes he told me and the other 500 plus people that everything was good, and not only good, but getting better. He told me not to judge anyone because they weren’t to judge me.
His big thought of the day was that we ought to take a meal to whoever was our next door neighbor and tell them that Jesus cares for them and so does the church. Hmmmmm. My neighbor’s name is Russ and he is heavily tattooed, curses like a sailor, and beats his wife every other weekend after sucking down a bottle of Jack Daniels. Somehow I didn’t think that fried chicken, apple pie, and a hugs-and-kisses message from Jesus was really going to impact him so I chose not to take the preacher’s advice.
At the end of his little chat, we all bowed our heads and reminded ourselves of how good God is, how good we are, and how good it is to be good. Funny…in spit of being reminded how grand is my state of being, I left feeling rather bad.
Actually, it didn’t even rise to level of bad, it was the saturation of nothingness… irrelevance… and needlessness. I wondered if anyone else had caught this bug during the last hour or waste. What would have made the difference? I’m really not sure. Maybe a tear, maybe a glitch in the flow of the ultra-smooth program, maybe a torn page in the hymn book to let me know that imperfections were allowed in this church. I mean, the babies didn’t even cry, for goodness sake. Maybe a preacher with less of an ego and more of a soul might have helped.
I don’t know; I honestly went there hoping to find this Jesus that my friend tells me I so desperately need. All I found was a group of mannequins who resemble a Hollywood cast party more than a group of people with an in-road to God. I’ll take Jesus any day that I can find him, but you can keep your Christianity. I mean, I can find insignificance in life without God and His polished posse.
I may not be a Christian, but I can tell you one thing, the only time I know of that Jesus went to a place of worship like the one I attended last Sunday, it is my understanding that he turned over their tables, called them thieves, and ran them all out so that they could think about what the house of God was really supposed to be. Maybe if I had seen that from someone this past Sunday, Christianity would be more appealing.
Very interesting Jeremy. I have to say I both agree and disagree with some of the things he said-although they are his perceptions and he has a right to them. He said “Maybe a preacher with less of an ego and more of a soul would help”. That hit me- I think for me the “ego” he talks about is based on fear, fear of being known. Fear of being utterly human and needy and STILL being a leader-servant. I kind of wonder if many pastors (I am not one, but have known quite a few) just feel that IF they show vulnerablility they lose something? I don’t know about others, but this sounds not just like some churches I have been to, but some places I have lived and certainly the way I grew up at times-“Look good on the outside and cringe and die a little each day on the inside.”–I think the lady he spoke to was very typical but probably not even aware of her own unawareness if you know what I mean. Many people like that want to be real and are scared to death to do it-its like a trance. In fact I have been to churches where trance-states would be the best way to describe the atmosphere. In my own life I have had struggles and it led me to some 12 step groups and its funny, but the 12 steps are really based on some pretty biblical ideas- equality of person before each other- in other words the social outcast is equal to the executive in the meeting. Also, the neediness of each participant is a given- “I am Mark and I am a —–. – whatever. The solution is the same- turning to God. The other areas of grace that are utilized are the 5th step – admitted to ourselves , to God and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs”. – 12th step- Carried this message to others and practice these principles in all our affairs. Sure these aren’t Bible verses directly- but the principles are directly biblical. I wonder if church were more along those lines more, we would see less pretension and more honest expression. We could still have every part of the service as it is but be more transparent, more real. We all struggle- the weak and the strong. How to do it? I don’t know exactly. But church needs to be a place for the hurting to go and be accepted as they are and a place where the truth is spoken both theological but also in an emotionally open way where the burdens of life can be expressed without fear of rejection. Just my 2 cents.
Mark,
Thanks for the 2 cents! It’s worth a lot here!
Jeremy,
Great post. I put a link to it on CFM blog.
if you’re thinking thoughts like these, clearly you need to hone up on your ancient language skills, man! jk 🙂
This is revealing. Thanks for sharing it, Jeremy.
I felt like this at one time, often I still do. My dad – a sometimes atheist -sometimes agnostic – admits he feels like this around any christian but me (and he may only say that to spare my feelings). I do clearly remember many times that I felt too imperfect to be in a church – that I had to quit smoking, drinking, cussing, remove my tattoo, etc., before I could go to church and definitely before God would want to have anything to do with me.
I will admit that there are times (but not always) when genuine smiles on others seem fake and plastic because I just can’t fathom any reason to have that kind of joy – even if I have experienced it at one time myself. There is a certain level of criticalness I maintain when I am hopeless that makes me see and think the worst of people. There is certainly something to that “plank in the eye” thing.
Mike,
Thanks my friend! I continue to love what you all are doing there at the Church for Men Florida! Keep it up! I may be wanting to do something similar soon.
Josh,
HA HA HA!!! That is the most I have laughed in a long time! So funny.
Missy,
You are absolutely right about the “plank in the eye” thing. I think it was Mike’s blog (see comment above at Church for Men Florida) which hit me hard recently when he wrote about praying for God to help him love church people as much as he loves non-churched people. God has been helping me see that in some ways, I show more grace to non-Christians than I do to Christians. So I am working on that too. Thanks for the reminder!
church has become a word with a million meanings.
i think that some of the people in the body of Christ
are being called to take off the plastic mask
and in doing so should be only uplifting
to those that are not at that place in their walk
Nancy,
Couldn’t agree with you more. Only problem is: until leadership recognizes it’s an issue that needs to be dealt with- many hurting people from outside the church will not be attracted to church and will seek connection elsewhere. To me, the Bible is full of admonishments to remove the mask. A lot of churches are doing it and are becoming more welcome places. Another thing- criticizing church is okay. Condemning isn’t. I remember saying things like this in church and being told I was divisive. Pulling the cover off of a problem is not divisive. But I certainly would never want to hurt a brother or sister who isn’t ready. For me it’s about awareness more than anything else. People are hurting and they need a place where they can unload their pain and hear the truth as well. I hope my post didn’t come across as insensitive to that lady that was described. I have been that lady in my attitudes as well at times. God bless.
i think that each and every person on earth is hurting and needs a place to share the pain and hear God’s truth.
Christians are still needy and hurting people, under constant attack, still subject to human needs and hurts, and forget to continue to look to God for what is needed.
i am not sure that what has become of the gatherings is what should be going on. but, i know that the Holy Spirit is changing things all of the time through the spirits of the believers who are part of the body of Christ.
if anyone thinks they are called to do something different than what is already being done, like going out into the community in some way, in their own homes or in another country…etc., then i think that they should do it.
we each need to be listening to the Spirit and that is how the changes are made.
i think that listening to the Holy Spirit and doing is best…if everyone did this instead of complaining or criticizing, then the Holy Spirit could really do some work through the body of Christ.
that is the word…if we all took on the importance of our own relationship with God and actually did something about it by steping outside of the little boxes that we make or the walls that have been built up between us, we could all take off the plastic masks and realize that most of the important work for a Christian is what secretly goes on in the relationship between the believer and God…a lot of the pretence and lies would not be able to survive the truth that would be sweeping through the minds and hearts of believers. there would be world-wide changes going on.
as it is, God can and will still work through all things, but, i think that we are missing out and even being misled if we do not do our personal relating with God in our whole life, a life that He has given to us by His Grace.
Hi Nancy- Thanks for your response. Again I couldn’t agree more. But I don’t want to criticize those who bring up legitimate issues by thinking those who bring something up are not in a good relationship with God. Still hold to my view- and yours as well. God Bless Mark
I think I might be this guy’s neighbor (except I don’t beat my wife, unless dirty looks count). Oh wait…the neighbor’s name is RUSS…not RANDY. Whew!:
“His big thought of the day was that we ought to take a meal to whoever was our next door neighbor and tell them that Jesus cares for them and so does the church. Hmmmmm. My neighbor’s name is Russ and he is heavily tattooed, curses like a sailor, and beats his wife every other weekend after sucking down a bottle of Jack Daniels. Somehow I didn’t think that fried chicken, apple pie, and a hugs-and-kisses message from Jesus was really going to impact him so I chose not to take the preacher’s advice.”
These kind of churches are shrinking. Young people aren’t buying what they’re selling anymore. The Kingdom of God is in good hands…20 to 30-something hands. They are BEING the church, not just GOING to church. It’s going to be a fun next decade or two!
Jeremy, thanks for the ref to Mike’s blog. I like it. 🙂
Non-christians show more grace to non-christians than christians, too, so we do really need that grace from each other. But it can’t be stupid, turn-a-blind-eye kind of grace. Encouraging grace that reminds us that God is rooting for us kind of grace is what I like.
And, shew! I just make Randy’s age cut-off there. But I do agree, I think the new gen has a handle on it. I am very hopeful.