be the church Archives - Page 2 of 7

I first got to know Richard Jacobson through his interaction with me on Twitter, Facebook, and his comments on this blog. I liked what I saw and started reading his blog, where he creates insightful and humorous cartoons and videos about the church and following Jesus.

So when he asked me to read and review his book, I said “Yes!” as quickly as possible.

(By the way, if you are an aspiring author, THAT is how you do it. I get a couple emails a day from people who want me to read and review their book, but who have never read my blog or one of my own books, have never left a comment on my blog, and who have never interacted me on Twitter or Facebook. Publishing, like everything else in life, begins with relationships. Richard’s book is proof. It debuted at #1 on Amazon in his category.)

The book that Richard wrote is called Unchurching. I have written several books about church myself, but this one is better than any of the ones I have written. At least … I like the way he organized his material and presented his ideas.

The book chapters are all quite short. This means that even if you only have five minutes here or there to read the book, you can likely finish a chapter in that amount of time. This is a smart way to write a book for today’s busy readers.

Best of all, even though Unchurching is a critical look at the church and contains a call for people to follow Jesus away from the four walls of Christendom, the book is incredibly gracious and kind. I could find no judgmental language, no finger pointing, and no condemnation.

I loved how he said that asking someone “What church do you go to?” is like asking someone “What family do you go to?” The second question makes no sense. We do not go to a family; we are in a family and we operate as a family. This is helpful as well, because the church is like a family, and when we think about it as a family, a lot of the questions that trip us up about how to “do church” fade away. Very rarely, for example, will a family ever have questions about “What day of the week should we meet?” or “Who gets to talk when we are together?”

Based on this idea of the church as a family, Richard Jacobson goes on to talk about church elders as facilitators, on how to carry out conflict resolution within the family of God, and a whole host of other related topics.

All in all, this is a great book about the church. If you have questions about what the church is, how it is to function, and why so many Christians today can confidently claim that they are better able to follow Jesus and be the church in the community now that they have stopped attending a Sunday morning meeting, this book is for you.

In a month or so, I plan on interviewing Richard Jacobson on my Theology.fm podcast, so make sure you tune in for that. Until then, buy a few copies of his book … one for yourself and a couple more to give away. Go here to get your copies of Unchurching today.

What a Day in the Life of the Church Looks Like for me

By Jeremy Myers

3 Comments

I am participating with several other authors and bloggers in a preparation for a conference in Portland called “All About Eve.” The other contributors are:

Wm. Paul Young, author of the The Shack
Deidre Havrelock, author of The Starving Church (and other books)
Skye McKenzie, author of Forty Days to Breakthrough
“Eve,” a follower of Jesus who has recently stopped “attending church”

The situation is that “Eve” has numerous questions about how to follow Jesus outside of the four walls of institutional Christianity. Go read her introduction here. I will be writing as her “pastor” to provide input and suggestions about how she and her family can do this. I put my introductory post up here.

All About Eve

I will be writing my post for the All About Eve blog on Thursdays for the next 40 weeks. I will be posting an excerpt of my blog post here, and then inviting you to go over to the other blog to read the rest of the post.

Here is an excerpt from today’s post:

Eve,

You have asked what it looks like for my family to go to church.

Let me try to describe it.

It all begins in the morning when my wife and I roll out of bed. While my wife wakes up our three girls and then makes breakfast, I stumble into the kitchen to make some coffee. Usually, my wife is several steps ahead of me, and the pot of black magic (aka “The Elixir of Life”) is ready to drink.

After breakfast, we all hop into the car and drive over to a local brick building. We go in and say “Hello” to the greeter at the front door. He sometimes gives us a little piece of paper that will help us know what is going on there that day. We then walk around a little bit, occasionally talking to people we meet. At one point in the morning, we give some money to a person standing behind a counter, and we often chat a little bit with them as well.

Then we leave Walmart with the things we just bought and go back out to our car.

The items we just bought are for a small gathering that will take place later that day at our neighbor’s house. We met him when we first moved into the neighborhood, and we quickly learned that he too is a follower of Jesus. So every so often, we gather at his house. Usually, before we begin, he shows us a project he is working on in his back yard, or a picture he painted when he was younger. His wife is also there, and she talks about their health concerns. Sometimes there is food involved, but not always. Then we get down to business.

On this day, we go outside into his front yard and start raking leaves. You see, he just recently had heart surgery, and is not able to rake all the leaves that have fallen. He also cannot run errands yet. We went to Walmart to buy them some food and household items, and are now at his house raking up the leaves in his front yard. When we are done, he thanks us profusely, and we chat a bit more before going home for lunch.

To read the rest of what a day in the life of the church looks like for me, go read the article here.

The NEW Finding Church

By Jeremy Myers

20 Comments

One of the first books I published was a book called Finding Church.

Can I be honest? I wasn’t very fond of that book…

So I was thrilled to learn that Wayne Jacobsen, one of my favorite authors (you must read his book So You Don’t Want to Go to Church Anymore) and podcasters (check out his podcast, “The God Journey“), was putting out a book by the very same title.

Finding Church, by Wayne Jacobsen

His book, due out in October, is also called Finding Church, but his book will be MUCH better than mine.

In fact, Wayne Jacobsen was kind enough to send me an advance copy of Finding Church, and let me tell you, it is as good as I expected.

The last line alone is worth the price of the book.

I’m not going to tell you what that last sentence of Finding Church is, but it has taken me more than 10 years to discover this truth (and I’m still learning it). Wayne’s writings and podcast we influential in helping me learn that truth.

One of the things I appreciate most about Finding Church is that Wayne writes in a gracious way what I have been trying to explain for years to various Christians who think I have abandoned God because I no longer “attend church.”

Some people seem to equate Christianity with attending “church.” They seem to believe if you are truly a Christian, or at least, if you are an obedient Christian, you will attend a “church” on Sunday morning. They seem to think that people like me, who no longer make “church” attendance as part of their weekly routine, have fallen away from God, abandoned the faith, or have given up on following Jesus.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

In fact, for people like me, no longer attending “church” has allowed me to follow Jesus in ways I had only dreamed of when I did attend “church” and experience the love of Jesus in ways I never thought possible.

For me, and millions more like me, the decision to no longer attend “church” was not the result of a failure to follow Jesus, but precisely because I was. It is my belief that Jesus led me away from attending “church” so that I could actually see the Church for the first time, and learn to be the Church in my neighborhood and community.

Obviously, these sorts of statements raise a lot of questions. Wayne’s book Finding Church is one of the best books I know of which answers some of these questions, and, more importantly, provides direction, encouragement, and guidance for those who think that Jesus may be inviting them to leave the four walls of institutional Christianity and follow Jesus into a deeper, more adventuresome, intimate, and real way of living.

In a gracious and loving style, Wayne Jacobsen provides encouragement, hope, and direction to all who have known that there must be something more to this thing we call Church, but have almost despaired of ever finding it.

Are you searching for Church?

If you have been looking for a new church, have been thinking of trying to start a new church, or have been have been wondering about how to be the church, make sure you read Finding Church first.

But be warned! This book doesn’t contain “the answer” you are looking for. There are no “how to” lists or “10 steps” to finding church. The book will, however, open your eyes to see that the Church has been sitting in front of you all along.

Finding Church is currently available for preorder from Amazon, or from Wayne’s own website, Lifestream.org. Go order a copy today!

The True Service of the Church

By Jeremy Myers

17 Comments

I recently received an encouraging email from Ward Kelley, a long-time reader of this blog and someone I consider an “online” friend. I asked his permission to share his comments with you…

Good morning. I got up this morning and decided I would read your book Put service back into church service. As I have been struggling with the whole idea of what church really is…I find that your writings in this area the most applicable to my station in life. Pages 66-68 concerning church programs and their need for a finite life, and of feeding “Jim Handley’s” family while he found a job struck a chord with me.

Last month my wife — the social creature with a big heart that she is — met a couple through a woman’s prayer group at the church we attend who was pouring out her heart about their impending homelessness. We took them out to dinner to assess their situation and after finding out they had not approached the church for assistance I suggested they request aid through the church benevolence fund.

She approached the church by phone, though they had been attending for some time, seeking $1,500.00 to help them move into an apartment. The finance leader of the church, without even so much as a conversation, said that a check for $250.00 would be left at the front desk for her. Something is better than nothing, of course, but the woman felt that since the man had not cared enough to inquire into their situation, that he did not care about them as people. She felt he was dismissive, and the $250, while very generous, was not nearly enough to actually provide any help to their actual crisis.

I called and left message for the finance pastor and received no call back so I cornered him at church. I asked him if he could fill in some blanks for me concerning this family and he had no facts. He stated they got calls all the time for money and couldn’t get the details on every one. I am aware this happens as I was involved with benevolence at a previous church. When I reminded him that they were not strangers but part of this church’s family… He couldn’t get away from me fast enough.

Is this how we are to treat family?

So I decided to take matters into my own hands.

I got more deeply involved searching out cheaper home alternatives for them and found several. Then I arranged a meeting to discuss in more depth with the husband his budget, and alternatives for them to live. My wife and I made it know that we were willing to help them bridge the gap with some financial and other assistance till they were back on their feet.

It was obvious that the work we did and the personal care we gave meant a lot to this family. My wife and I enjoyed it immensely as well!

Why didn’t the church do this for them?

Though of course, as you point out on your blog, since my wife and I “are the church” I suppose “the church” did help out this family…

In the end, the man decided to move his family in with his father rather than take one of the alternative routes I offered. A week later he asked for $300 to help with the transition. Had the finance pastor spent 15 minutes with this couple, listening, showing compassion, and guiding them biblically, he could have accomplished this in the name of the church.

Ironically this same finance pastor was busy preparing a “Church Event” of outreach to poor children in the community where they came to the church for free health and dental checkups, and haircuts. I cynically suggested to my wife that this was subliminally designed as a membership drive… Like so many churches they are expending massive time and money on programs to bring people in the front door, while they lose even more out the back door by not truly loving or caring for the people who are already there.

Again, a few weeks ago my wife found a young couple living in a tent behind a strip mall. She began by helping them by driving them around, and bringing them over to shower and wash their clothes. In subsequent conversations I believe that they are Christians … yet young and immature in the faith. Last week a storm blew through, knocked their tent down and soaked all their meager belongings, so they have been in our home since then. Some friends of ours offered to allow them to live in a travel trailer in their yard till they got back on their feet. We met last night as a group to decide a game plan for this young couple. My friend is also struggling with his role in the “church,” and is finding this sort of approach to be much closer to the way of Jesus.

Not all relationships are instant success stories!

Of course, it is critical to remember that even when serving others in such tangible ways, lives are messy, people change slowly, and there are numerous setbacks and we walk with people through their difficulties.

Take, for example, the couple that recently moved into our home with us. They were within one day of having the trailer ready to move into … and blew it.

The guy (James) took a day off from his contracting job to go over and finish the job. He decided that since he was off work that it would be a good day to buy a case of beer and get plastered. Once drunk he managed to get into a fight with the trailer owner’s son in law who was helping him. Needless to say, after being given a warning during our sit down meeting not to cause any drama … he was told never to come back.

After spending the night at an emergency department with him I directed my wife to take Mandy up to the local extended stay and pay for their first week.

It is frustrating in one sense working with dysfunctional people, even more so when they claim to be born again. Living in the south, everyone has biblical knowledge, and can talk a good game … but the discipleship, the love, the need to serve Christ are not present. We are going to continue to assist them, rides to work, church, grocery, etc. I reasserted to my friend and wife that sometimes serving Christ, and people, can get messy.

We don’t love and serve others for thank you’s or recognition, but to serve Christ.

Anyway, I think your writings in this and other books about the church are spot on. It is a struggle to make the transition, but I wanted you to know that your writings encourage me on to finding my place in the body of Christ, whether others find in unconventional or not.

Ward Kelly

Thank you, Ward! Your email is not only an encouragement to me, but to many others who are trying to follow Jesus in similar ways.

Here is a video from Keith Green that Ward sent along later which reminds us of this point:

Do any of you have similar stories to share about how God is using you to “be the church” in your neighborhood and community? Feel free to share them in the comments below!

Bible and Theology Questions 2

By Jeremy Myers

15 Comments

The last couple weeks I have been working my way through dozens of Bible and theology questions which people have submitted through that “ask a question” area in the sidebar. If you have been following along, you will note that some questions require a whole post to answer. Others can be answered more succinctly. These shorter answers get put in one post like the following where I try to answer several Bible and theology questions together.

This post deals with Bible and theology questions about attending church, tithing, and…. masturbation.

Feel free to leave your own comments about these questions in the comment section below.

Question on Going to Church

Can a person be a Christian and not go to church ?

Yes! A thousand times yes! People who believe in Jesus for eternal life are the church, whether or not they “attend church.”

It’s an old saying, but it’s true: Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going into a garage makes you a car.

Similarly, a car can be a car whether or not it ever parks in a garage, and a Christian can be a Christian whether or not he or she ever attends church.

Scripture backs this up as well, for there is not one place in the Bible that commands us to attend church. Not even Hebrew 10:25.

Question on Tithing

If it is the priests only God is speaking to through Malachi, then why in 3:6 does the audience seem to change to the “the children of Jacob” and “the whole nation of you” in verse 9 –it seems there is a change here.

I imagine you read this post about tithing and your question is based on what you read there? Maybe you could leave your question in the comment section there so that people could interact with you on it…

I probably should have clarified that Malachi was written primarily to the religious leaders of Israel, but not only to them. As the spiritual leaders, they were the spiritual representatives for Israel, and so naturally, Israel followed their lead. So Malachi 3:6 does mention the sons of Jacob, which may refer to all the people of Israel. Although even then, the statement in Malachi 3:6 is not so much about the actions of the son of Judah, but God’s long-suffering grace upon them. I read this verse as saying that God does not consume the sons of Jacob for the actions of the priests (or of the forefathers – Malachi 3:7). God is patient and long-suffering, and keeps His Word.

As to the statement in Malachi 3:9 about the whole nation, I did reference that in the post. Malachi is saying that the priests are not just robbing from God, but are robbing from the whole nation as well. This is further evidence that Malachi is primarily writing to the priests here, because if he were writing to all the people, it would not make sense to say that all the people were robbing from all the people. It makes more sense to see that the people are tithing, but the priests are stealing the tithe, and as such, they are robbing God and robbing the whole nation.

Question on Masturbation

I’ve been asking to be free/liberated from addiction to porn and masturbation. I have yet to be set free and I don’t want to lose my salvation because of it. Am I forgiven for doing theses things, because deep down I think it’s wrong, but I’m just not sure it’s a sin. I just know I’m a slave to this. Please help.

Honestly, this question probably demands a full post, but I just didn’t want to write a blog post with the word “masturbation” in the title… so let me see if I can answer the question briefly…

First, the Bible really doesn’t say anything one way or the other about masturbation. Sure, some people make some arguments from the Levitical laws, but I’m not going to get into all that. I don’t think they apply.

I personally do not think that masturbation is sinful.

Pornography, however, is definitely wrong, and almost all studies show that pornography and masturbation go hand in hand…. Sorry. Bad pun. Pornography objectifies women, creates unrealistic ideas about sex, and causes immense mental and emotional damage in the minds of men who look at it. Besides all this, there are numerous Scriptures which instruct men to not look at women lustfully (e.g., Matt 5:28).

But the real question is how to deal with the addiction of pornography and masturbation.

The answer to that is the same answer for any sort of addiction, whether it is overeating, drugs, alcohol, gaming, or gambling: Addictions are overcome only by the supernatural power of God.

How do you tap into this supernatural power of God? There is only one way: recognize that no matter what, God loves you and forgives you.

You asked about whether or not you will lose your salvation for looking at porn and masturbating. The answer is no. Why not? Because God loves you and forgives you. Only this knowledge will lead you to the freedom from sin that is yours in Jesus Christ.

As long as we are afraid of not being forgiven by God, that fear keeps us enslaved to sin. It only when we begin to understand the infinite love and grace of God toward us that the power of sin loses its hold in our lives. Fear keeps us in bondage. Fear keeps us trying to depend on our own effort and our own strength to liberate ourselves from our own sin… and it never works. Only when we lose the fear of losing God’s love, and come to see that God loves us and forgives us no matter what, do we get to the place where sin no longer has the draw that it once did.

I know that this seems backwards and upside down from what is taught in most Christian books and Christian pulpits.

I know that what I am saying sounds like people have the freedom to go sin all they want.

But you know what? This is what I read in Scripture. Sin has dire consequences, for sure, but one of those consequences is NOT that God will stop loving you or forgiving you.

I maybe should also share that I speak from experience on this sort of question. I have an incredibly addictive personality. I have been addicted to many things during my life (I am not comfortable saying which things on this blog). Some of the things I was addicted to for twenty years or more. For some it was only five years or so. Some of these addictions have caused great pain for myself and my wife.

I tried everything to conquer and defeat these addictions, from fasting and praying for days on end to accountability groups to self-help books. Nothing ever worked until I came to the realization that God’s love and forgiveness for me was without end. Though I continued to stumble and fall, the recognition that God loved and forgave me led, over time, to a lack of desire for that particular addiction. I cannot say “how” it worked, only that it did.

Unchurching from Churchianity

What a Day in the Life of the Church Looks Like for me

All About Eve

The NEW Finding Church

Finding Church, by Wayne Jacobsen

Are you searching for Church?

The True Service of the Church

Bible and Theology Questions 2

Question on Going to Church

Question on Tithing

Question on Masturbation

Theological Study Archives

Bible Study Archives

Advertise or Donate

Search (and you Shall Find)

Get Books by Jeremy Myers

Schedule Jeremy for an interview

Click here to Contact Me!