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Are House Churches Weird?

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I am facing a house church dilemma. Maybe some of you can help me.

weird house church

I have visited some house churches that were …. well… not normal. They were kind of weird. Have you?

I don’t really know how to describe it, and I don’t want to sound harsh or condescending, but I felt quite uncomfortable at these meetings.

They seemed a bit… cultish.

My House Church Experience

I would have felt very uncomfortable inviting any of my non-Christian friends to such a meeting. Also, a few of the people were somewhat socially inept. I got the distinct feeling that the primary reason some of them were in a house church was because they would not be able to function properly with people in more traditional churches.

Has anyone else ever felt this way, or is it just me?

Am I being too judgmental? Am I the one that has the problem? Is this just my critical spirit getting in the way?

Are House Churches just Small “Regular” Churches?

Frankly, it seems that most house church groups were not even doing much of anything different from a traditional church, except on a much smaller scale. Five or ten people gather on Sunday mornings at about 10:00 am, sit in chairs, sing a few songs, spend some in prayer, and then have a Bible discussion, which more often than not, is dominated by one person.

This is really not that different from what takes place in any other church. It was just smaller.

Oh, and there was no paid pastor.

But really, is that what the house church movement is all about? I hope not.

There has got to be more to organic church, missional church, and house church than being a mini-church. I have some ideas on what church can look like, but I haven’t had the courage yet to try it. I think I’m going to give it a shot…

2013 Update: This post was originally written in 2011 on a different website. Since that time, I have embarked on my church “experiment” and have found more love, encouragement, fellowship, and relational warmth than almost any previous “church” experience. To keep updated on some of what I am thinking, doing, and experiencing in my “church” journey with Jesus, subscribe to my email newsletter, in which I send out personal updates and free eBooks.

Also, one book my wife and I read this past year which sounded eerily familiar to what we have personally experienced, was the fictional “novel” by Wayne Jacobsen and Dave Coleman, So You Don’t Want to Go to Church Anymore. Wayne is coming out with a book soon called Finding Church, which I hope will be encouraging and helpful as well.

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Do you like rain? Imagine being homeless in the rain…

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homeless manThe cold rain streams down my window as I sit in my warm and dry home, yet hot, wet tears stream down my cheeks as I watch the rain.

I love the rain, especially since we need it so much in Southern California. But I am not crying for the rain.

I am crying for the people I love who must sit in the rain, soaking wet, with nowhere to go and nothing to cover themselves.

Recently my wife and I distributed a car trunk full of tarps, sweatshirts, sweaters, pants, blankets, food and other supplies to the homeless living in San Diego. But our meager supplies fell far short of meeting what they need.

This morning the temperature is fifty degrees. Fifty isn’t all that cold unless you’re soaked to the skin sitting on a wet sidewalk in the rain. Sitting under a tarp helps, but not everyone has a tarp. Some are sitting in the rain, shivering.

Blood on the Sidewalk

Many of our Christian friends are afraid to go with us to buy and distribute clothes, food, and tarps to the homeless. They’re afraid to go to the inner city and mingle with the poor, the bikers, the gangs. They blanch when we tell them of the times we have stood on still-wet blood stains on the sidewalk where someone was murdered during the previous night. (I think this has happened five or six times.)

Sometimes we’re afraid before we go. For some reason we’re never afraid when we’re there. We see beautiful people, who are in the middle of life’s messes.

To Show The Love of Jesus

My friend who does not follow Jesus, who loves the homeless, the poor, and our gay friends wants to go with me today. She is trying to take off work for a couple of hours to join me. We’ll buy tarps and then hand them out.

When the homeless ask who we are and why we’re doing it I’ll say “I follow Jesus and we’re here to show the love of Jesus.” Then I’ll ask their name, and ask what they need. My friend will write it down in my little notebook.

Sometimes I pray with them there on the sidewalk, in the rain. Sometimes they ask about Jesus. Sometimes they bless me, at God’s bidding. I bless them in return.

We’re safe, warm, and dry. But are they?

There is so much need in the world!

And YOU can help.

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The Institution

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institution of church

Jesus’ attitude toward the Temple was not “this institution needs reforming,” nor “the wrong people are running this place,” nor yet “piety can function elsewhere too.” His deepest belief regarding the Temple was eschatological: the time had come for God to judge the entire institution.

—N. T. Wright, The Challenge of Jesus, p. 64.

I wonder what Jesus would say about the church institution?

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Stop Attending Church to Start Spiritual Conversations

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Stop Attending ChurchNo, I’m not telling you to stop attending church.

You must do what you believe God wants you to do.

If you Stop Attending Church

But if you stop attending church so that you can be the church, it may be the best thing that ever happens to you in your life with Jesus and your evangelistic endeavors.

When I stopped attending church, the number of spiritual conversations I had with people skyrocketed. Previously, when I was a pastor and a regular church attender, I rarely had spiritual conversations with people who were not already in a church.

But after I stopped attending church, and started trying to follow Jesus into the world, the number of conversations I had with people who don’t go to church became a nearly daily occurrence. Now, as I go about my day, run errands, and so on, I have been shocked at how Jesus just seems to insert himself into conversations.

Previously, I used to try to figure out how to “change the subject” from weather and politics to the Bible and Jesus. It was always awkward and unnatural. Now, I sometimes find myself talking about following Jesus outside of “the church” to someone, and I think to myself, “How in the world did we end up here?”

I don’t really know how to explain it.

Yes, I am praying for opportunities to talk with people, and our girls are real outspoken about Jesus, and my wife and I are always carrying around Christian books, so maybe those spark the conversations. But we have always done these things. What changed?

Only one thing. I stopped “going to church” so I could be the church. It’s not always an either-or, but it’s what we did.

People Want to Know why You Stopped Attending Church

When people find out I’m trying to follow Jesus but I don’t “attend church” they are intrigued. They often want to find out more, and the conversation turns to subjects of following Jesus, questions about God, and other spiritual matters.

I make it a point to say that I have not stopped attending church because I hate the church or am running from God. No, I am more involved now with church than ever before. I am trying to follow Jesus in ways that show love to others than ever before. The time and energy I used to devote to attending church I now seek to use in being the church among others.

This sort of conversation usually leads to another conversation, and another, until eventually, we have a relationship, and we hang out, eat lunch together, help each other with work around the yard or house, and so on.

So for me, stopping attending church seems to be a good “conversation starter” with lots of other people who do not go to church.

Have you had experiences like this, where God seems to work in and through your life once you have started “being the church” rather than just “attending church”?

(Note: In the past few years, I have met a few people who were “sent out” by their church as missionaries with this sort of task. They work secular jobs, and just meet regularly with people for discussions. They made it clear to their church that they will not be attending church and will not be trying to convince the people they meet with to attend church. The sending church agrees to this, and supports them in prayer… and sometimes financially. That is awesome!)

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What if…

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This is from a 2008 post by Perry Noble. I thought it was good then, and it’s still good today.

what if questions about church

I had some “what if” thoughts the other day that I wanted to share…

  • WHAT IF the church really believed that Jesus was as powerful as Scripture says that He is?
  • WHAT IF we were not afraid to BEG GOD for ridiculous things, knowing that He is able?
  • WHAT IF we REALLY believed that Acts 2:41-47 was actually the starting point of all that God wants to do through the church and NOT the watermark?
  • WHAT IF we really believed that a life dedicated to Christ means that we are completely His…not just on Sunday?
  • WHAT IF every church became a cheerleader of other churches and not critics?
  • WHAT IF we really believed the church existed to CHANGE the world and not just to “meet my needs!”
  • WHAT IF we really believe that teenagers and children are worth the investment and poured resources into them instead of making them sell doughnuts in front of department stores?
  • WHAT IF we really believed God’s Kingdom should grow through the church instead of being stagnant?
  • WHAT IF we were willing to lay aside our personal preferences for the sake of reaching those who are far from God?
  • WHAT IF we refused to participate in slandering and tearing down another person?
  • WHAT IF we sought to embrace God’s plan for our lives (and churches) instead of trying to get Him to bless ours?

Those are just some of the things I’ve been wondering.

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